Anybody remember Jesse Ventura? No? Oh sure you do, just jog your memory a bit.

Mr. Ventura, we need to have a talk. You first busted on the big scene during your run for Governor of Minnesota. We tolerated you then. You were brash and little out there, but hey, it was refreshing. In an uncomfortable sort of way. Sure you were a pro wrestler, but you were a Navy Seal and we at least respected you for that. You've also been married to the same woman for over thirty-four years. That's more than Nevada Governor Jim Gibbons can say.

Back in your wrestling days, there were different expectations. Wrestling is all about the drama and the emotion (kind of like an all male soap opera), so even though it's not our cup of tea, we're okay that you looked like this:

We didn't even suspect you might be gay. And Jesse, let me just say that few self-respecting straight men wear powder pink blazers lined with sequins. Do you see how much slack we've given you throughout your career?

When the public at large first became acquainted with you via the political sphere, you looked something like this:

Very fierce. A nice, understated bald head goes a long way in politics. We all took you seriously. We believed you actually had something worthwhile to say.

But now, Jesse? Now we are not so convinced. Why do you ask? Because now you look like this:

and this:

And after much patience, Jesse, it needs to be said, RECEDING HAIRLINE MULLETS ARE NEVER OKAY. Let's start with the basic premise of the mullet. It's always been ugly no matter which way you slice it, but in the 80s it was acceptable. Then add to that a clear recession of the hair line (nothing wrong with that as sometimes it's a fact of life). The result is utterly tragic and I'm finding it difficult to take anything he's saying seriously. Kind of like how I feel when Don King speaks. Please, stop the madness and cut off the shag!

Posted by Ambra at May 14, 2009 11:07 AM in Fashion Faux Pas