The Presidential Action Figures
May 18, 2007
Normally I stay far away from the presidential debates. On top of being incredibly boring, the debates on either side of the political spectrum are a bit too reminiscent of a high school homecoming queen competition. They are certainly just as glossy if not even more catty. As I watched the GOP candidates mildly duke it out this past Tuesday evening, I fully expected to see various sets of cheerleaders popping out in between questions. Team Romney's cheerleaders would be wearing "temple ready" uniforms, of course, but they'd be peppy nonetheless.
We certainly are in interesting times. When Woodrow Wilson was elected president in 1913, he didn't have to participate in presidential debates on television nor did he have to worry about his word flubs or neck fat appearing on YouTube the next day. Moreover, many have speculated that if the American public had known Wilson suffered such severely debilitating consequences from his stroke, they may not have elected him at all. I'm no scholar on presidential history so I can't comment on whether or not this was good or bad in the case of Wilson, but I would speculate that such a situation probably wouldn't have been good for someone like say...Bill Clinton. Though the meaning of "good" here is entirely relative; no television persona and platform on which to be "outed" in front of millions of viewers = great for Clinton, however terribly bad for the American people.
With the advent of Web 2.0, every statement, every word, and every misplaced hair is irrevocable. Not only is it irrevocable, if you're a public figure, it's cached, uploaded, downloaded, edited, spliced, and played on repeat from now until all of eternity so you had darn well better get that sentence out correctly the first time. So what do we get when these are the times in which we live? Presidential Action Figures. But not just any action figures. These ones have perfect white teeth, shellacked hair and various strings you can pull to hear a selected catch phrase or opinion on pet "political" issues. In the case of this week's Republican debate, the phrase heard when pulling said string always included the phrase "I am more conservative than you."
I didn't watch the first Democratic debate so I can't make a fair comparison, but given the fact that Hillary Rodham Rodham Rodham Rodham Clinton was present, I suspect the same party-toting banter was carried on - except in Hilary's case, she wasn't an action figure but more like a blow up doll. Or better yet -- a large balloon on a parade float, displayed for all to see and not very useful for much of anything. And while I'm in free-form writing, beginning sentences with conjunctions and whatnot, can I just go on record and say that America as whole (or even a half) is so not going to elect a woman as president? Ain't. Gonna. Happen. So by all means, please give Hillary the nomination so all the other nations can laugh at us.
With the parade float in the mix, as well as Senator Obama (whose racial credibility is going to flip flop almost as much as Hillary's maiden name), this promises to be quite an interesting year. Can't say I'm looking forward to seeing Presidential Myspace pages and all, but I am quite curious to see how this all pans out.
Until then, I'm not holding my breath on any one candidate. There are far more important and interesting things going on in the world and I am certain the formaldehyde will preserve the candidates until we get closer to the election next year.
Posted by Ambra at May 18, 2007 1:32 AM in Politics
Aw man, you missed your chance!
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It's so great to have you powered up again. So many of us need your point of view,intellect, candor, sense of humor, and pinpoint accuracy.
Congrats on being married, and (sorry if this is too early to think about) we need parents like you, so when that time comes, it'll be another great thing. In the meantime, continue to puncture pomposity, and keep looking at the world through your wonderfully gifted set of eyes. You can't believe how great I feel seeing you back at it. I wish you and yours eternal happiness. God Bless