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Al Sharpton and outgoing Democratic National Committee chairman Terry McAuliffe

 

WorldNetDaily reports:

A master's student at a New York college was kicked out of the graduate education program because of what officials claim was a "mismatch" between his personal beliefs and the goals of the program.

According to the Foundation for Individual Rights in Education, or FIRE, a nonprofit group, the trouble began when Le Moyne College master's student Scott McConnell wrote a paper that advocated "strong discipline and hard work" in the classroom and an environment that allows "corporal punishment."

Oh man that's funny. Could be because I'm writing this at 4:39 in the morning. Could be because it's funny. I'm not going to argue for or against corporal punishment in schools. I think that's a parent-mandated thing. But considering the popularity of shows like "The Supernanny" where a stern British woman has to come help pathetic American families parent their wayward children...yeah, you get the point. See my post "Spanking: the best way to save tax dollars" for more clarity.

(Brief caveat: Mkay, so I've seen once and read enough about this "Supernanny" show to get the gist. What I don't get is what type of parent pleads with a 4-year-old who hit them, called them a "poo-poo-head," and then screamed bloody murder for 5 minutes. Maybe it's cultural, but I'm 23, I'm grown, I pay my own bills, and if I ever called my mother a poo-poo-head, I'd be picking up the pieces of my face from the other side of the room.)

 

At the rebellious age of 14, the age at which doing homework takes a back seat to shopping and the entire hemisphere hinges on being "liked," I made a very wise decision. It was probably one of the better decisions of my formative years. Certainly a lot better than the time my friends and I decided to break into our neighbor's house to steal shampoo for kicks. One day, I solemnly decided that sex and I wouldn't meet each other's countenance until I had two circular objects firmly planted on my left ring finger. I think my mentor Lakita Garth said it best when she proclaimed, "No ringy. No dingy." Not exactly revolutionary or noteworthy, but certainly not the norm in the halls of insecurity also known as high school.

Was this decision deserving of special recognition? Applause? A gold medal? A cookie? A special seat in heaven? No siree Bob. Seeing as how sex was designed to be enjoyed within the confines of marriage, I always viewed abstinence as my reasonable service. You know, the least I could do with this here my one and only vessel on the earth. Amidst a society that fed me the lies that I couldn't do it, I was stubborn enough to follow through with my word, even if it killed me.

And it did. Curbing enthusiasm requires that some aspect of your own will be put to death. Any pious attitude or ego acquired by those who somehow feel morally superior for remaining abstinent will eventually have the crap beat out of it by the humility necessary to carry out the decision until the end (or rather, the beginning). It ain't easy. The longer you wait, the more humble you become. Just ask A.C. Green; he could write the book.

The odd thing is, today virginity is usually packaged as this unrealistic option we shouldn't be teaching and a reality for which most teenagers are ridiculed. Yet the truth is, adults who've chosen not to test drive the car probably have to endure more naysayers than the average pimple-faced teenager. Then again, high school is all about perspective so the small things become big and vice versa (read: everyone eventually grows up and realizes that high school was a joke).

As an adult, I've heard every defense in the book--everything from "How will you know you and your spouse will be sexually compatible?" to "But won't that make your wedding night awkward?" to threats that celibacy leads to geriatric ovaries. At 23, it's safe to say that I'm willing to suffer whatever "consequences" there may be if it means being without the excess baggage. You know, multiple partners, hurts, disappointments, soul ties, unwanted pregnancies, abortions, gonorrhea, and all that other fun stuff that accompanies having sex outside of marriage.

The unwritten rules of this modern-day dating game are advantageous to say least. And what a game it is. William Raspberry's Valentine's Day column in the Washington Post posed a very important question: "What ever happened to courtship?"

Maybe Valentine's Day is a good time to talk about something that's been on my mind for a while: the alarming decline of courtship.

Calling it alarming, of course, places me firmly on the old-fogy side of the discussion. The youngsters I talk to at Duke University don't seem particularly alarmed, though a few will acknowledge some discomfort, some disappointment that they find themselves in a world in which boys don't come courting. They are, willy-nilly, in a hookup culture that they (the girls, at least) don't remember asking for but feel powerless to change.

This "will-nilly" hook-up culture Raspberry alludes to is the antithesis to purity. These days, college dating relationships are messy. Raspberry goes on to narrate the account of a female college student from his "Family and Community" class at Duke. The student recounts the many meanings of the phrase "hooking up" in the college world. The general "no-strings attached" nature of the hook-up culture is on a rapid decline. Sex has been cheapened and purity is a joke.

Amidst the debates about declining standards of morality on television and the seemingly incessant back and forth nature of conversations on abstinence education and propriety in media, we often fail to stop to examine the philosophy behind the criticisms of our racy culture.

Rarely do we make a case for purity. Instead, far too often, Americans get caught in the mire of partisan conversation about symptoms and fail to address the root issue. The "they're going to do it anyway" philosophy is a cop-out. Contrary to what Darwin might assert, human beings are not animals. We don't copulate like rabbits. We have revelation; we have logic; and most importantly, we have self-control.

It's been said a thousand times over that "sex sells." Why does it sell? Well, probably because it appeals to the weakest and most vulnerable aspects of humanity: our flesh. What troubles me the most is that in general, we accept the peddling of sex as a valid way to go about cultivating our society. We dismiss its effects on children and young adults. We draw no connections between promiscuity, health, and the economy. Most tragically, those who wish to change this get labeled "fundamentalists," while most others argue counterpoints under the banner of over-romanticized concepts like a "free-society."

One of the definitions of the word "pure" is "free from what vitiates, weakens, or pollutes." One of the biggest paradigms in life is the fact that true freedom has boundaries.

Our nation's perception of freedom is a crock. Behind the facade of freedom, we've bred some of the most bound-up, oppressed, and insecure young people in the world--mentally that is. Don't let the fancy exterior fool you. From the Hamptons to the Southside of Chicago, there are young people who are empty and lack identity. And when voids are present, there is counterfeit relief available to all. These days, you can fill up just about anywhere with just about anything.

And yet we wonder why we now see fifth graders having sex in the cafeteria elevators. It's a collective effort really. You know Hillary Clinton's whole "village" concept? Yeah, it backfired. Our "progressive" society has fostered an environment where love is awakened before its time. The case for purity is derailed by the need to convince a certain cross-section of America that "love" even has "a time."

I mean, hey, if it feels good do it. Right? No consequences. No major ramifications.

The way we go about male-female relationships in this country could use an overhaul. The improper images consistently put before us have desensitized us to the sanctity of marriage, the power of purity, and male/female identity. Thrusting the younger generation into adult scenarios and the same cycle of hit and miss relationships dooms us to repeat the mistakes of our parents. Quite simply, we practice divorce.

Call me crazy, but I believe life as a teenager can be made easier and more purposeful without sex and complexly short-sighted relationships. Purity isn't a destination, but it certainly is a direction. I think we should head that way. If not for my generation's sake, at least for those who come behind us.

Elsewhere on the Internet:
- "Can a Black Man Be Abstinent?" by Duane Brayboy of Black Informant
- "Not Until My Wedding Night" by Lakita Garth, Essence Magazine (PDF)

 

• Bloggers and CNN Yeah and um, in case you didn't know, CNN president Eason Jordan resigned last Friday from pressure stemming from some inappropriate comments he made regarding American soldiers. I am also proud to report that I had nothing to do with it. In light of Eason's resignation, Michael Bowen Cobb theorizes on why the blogosphere is so powerful.

• Kanye West & the Grammys I'm not even going to address West's self-absorbed Grammy performance, which featured his death, burial, and resurrection (is your stomach okay?). Not only does Jesus "Walk," He also "sells." Rapper Kanye West's fable won the Grammy Award for "Best Rap Song". You may recall my distaste for the song, "Jesus Walks," on the merits of its deceiving nature. Entertainment Weekly music writer, Neil Drumming, inadvertently hit the nail on the head when he said, "It is a spiritual song, but that is not why it is popular, that is secondary. It is really an addictive, engaging and unique track. The first time I heard it at a party it had just come out and already people were dancing to it."

  Yep, sounds like the Gospel to me.

• Jose Canseco, the Buster There is a difference between a whistleblower and a snitch. Where I'm from, we call 'em "Busters." In former baseball player Jose Canseco's new book, "Juiced: Wild Times, Rampant 'Roids, Smash Hits, and How Baseball Got Big," he tells all, and manages to rat out a few folks while he does it, accusing, a few players of using steroids. I have a problem with people who profit off of supposedly "outing" other people. That means you too Kimberly Bell.

• What no Peanuts? Air Travel Gone Bad Both Paul Musgrave of "In the Agora," and blogger Chris Busch share my sentiments with the pain of modern-day air travel. You'll recall last spring, I too complained.

• Obama Deserves Black History Month Props So says the blog, "The Obama Factor" in regards to a Houston Chronicle article on the topic. Senator Obama is only the 5th black U.S. senator in history. He was also the first black president of the Harvard Law Review. He also has a beautiful (and smart) wife and family.

• New E-Mail Policy La Shawn Barber declares that she can no longer respond to every single email anymore. Funny, I just made the same decision today too. Then again, I have emails from 2001 that I've yet to reply to.

• All Ideas Welcome Unless You're Referring to Homosexuals "Tongue Tied" points to an interesting story about a UNLV economics professor being punished for stating that homosexuals tend to plan less for the future. Considering the philosophical contributions of famous gay economist, John Maynard Keynes, it's safe to say that lack of procreation (and by default, lack of generational transfer) doesn't motivate people to plan for the future.

 

Comments are now working. Thank you to Roderick Howard, web-extraordinaire for his help getting everything fixed. These are the people you wish you could put on staff. One of these days.

 

Alright homies, you may be seated. Now listen up; this could get screedy.

So here we are in 2005 and after thirteen months of operating this little-known haven on the web, I've yet to fully state my intentions. And since I've had my fill of unsolicited advice from people who barely know me, it's probably about that time.

I've owned "nykola.com" since I was 19-years-old. In that time, it's evolved from absolutely nothing to the weblog you see today. Who knows where it will go tomorrow. I'm not on a quest to become the world's most popular blogger. That my friends, is what nerds do. And if I haven't made it abundantly clear, I am not a nerd.

"They" are.

I consider myself a fairly candid person. From the time I first told my babysitter that her breath stank until now, I've never been one to pull punches. Throughout the course of this site, I've shared my insights drawn from aspects of my life, my failures, my frustrations, my vulnerable times, and most importantly, my inability to hold my bladder on one very embarrassing occasion. There's only one other person that knew about that, and now you all know. You should feel special.

Honestly, that's just me. I write from the personal. I don't know any other way to write. Well, actually I do, but I don't like it, and when they make me do it, I get irritable. Yep, just like the bowels.

When a person shares about life, it's understandable that we might be inclined to think we know everything about that individual. You know, how said person ought to think, live life, write, pursue success, and all that other typical patronizing nonsense that accompanies being a "dumb" and inexperienced 23-year-old.

So what if I can't spell "definitely," me isn't borned yesterday.

Reading unsolicited advice is like eating chicken. You eat the meat and spit out the bones--unless you're Al Sharpton, because he definitely looks like somebody who eats chicken gristle. And boy do I have a pile of bones. I keep every single feedback email that I receive. The good, the bad, and the atrociously ugly. It could be masochistic, but I prefer to think of it as a subtle reminder of where I'm going. Cryptic, ignorant and spiteful emails could make a really good appendix of a book one day.

(As a brief interjection--and with apologies to William Shakespeare--I need to lament, "We are bloggers. If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you send us hateful emails, do we not pray the locusts invade your house?" I jest.)

After a year of publishing my thoughts, my feelings, and my world on an almost daily basis, I can say with blessed assurance that I've gotten over the need to be understood. At this point, if people have been reading thus far and they still don't understand my character, then they never will, or they simply don't want to. And quite frankly, I'm tired of explaining it to the latecomers. That's what the archives are for. Foo.

I learned a long time ago that people will hate you if you do, and they'll hate you if you don't. People are the most fickle creatures on the planet. I promise you, gerbils have more stability than the average person. If you're doubtful of this reality, that is fine by me, but I bet you they could get through the cereal aisle at the supermarket faster than we could.

I've always figured, if there's gonna be hateration up in this bloggery, then I might as well take a beating for speaking the truth as I see fit.

*Right side of the room stands up and claps*

Personally, I'd rather die with no friends having been the person God called me to be, than live in popularity and in utter disobedience to what I should be doing with my life.

People often ask me why I don't have BlogAds or any other advertisements in order to gain some revenue from my site. Aside from the fact that I find BlogAds incredibly gaudy, the reason is simple: I like doing things my way. Getting paid would be great, but not at the expense of not feeling the liberty to write whatever I feel needs to be written. It would be out of my nature not to tell it as I see that it is and it will be a cold day in Michael Moore's sauna before I have a Rush Limbaugh ad on my site. Which leads me to my next point.

The second reason I won't get BlogAds is because there isn't one bone in my body that desires to see GOP paraphernalia advertised on Nykola.com. (No she didn't) Oh yes she did.

I don't want to see "Red State Gear"; I don't want to see "Michael Moore Hates America" (even though he does); I don't want to see "Conservative Singles" or any other hokey advertisements typical of any weblog that has spoken against abortion. I'm sorry, but I can't fool with the partisan nonsense. It's just not me. I refuse to be a donkey or an elephant. My mama named me, "Ambra," and last I checked, I was a son.

I think God is bigger than that. I think this life is bigger than that, and so are you.

Likewise, as fun as it sounds, I have zero desire to be put in some proverbial punditry/columnist box, speaking for a man-made political side of the fence (or as blogger T-Steel once said, "yappin' for Scooby Snacks"), and being patted on the head like I'm some kind of credit to, well, you know. They could. not. pay. me. enough.

Not only is that unlike me, it's also cheesy, boring, and short-reaching. But hey, if that's what you're after, I ain't mad atcha. It's just not my cup of tea. I would however, take a book deal.

Me? I'm after something bigger. This is a weblog. And I might I add, it is just a weblog. I think sometimes we forget this. And on behalf of bloggers who obsess, I will say this: "Get a life." The sun does not rise and set on the existence of your weblog.

*Everyone stands up and claps*

"Nykola.com" is a one dimensional aspect of who I am. It's admittedly an obese and well-fed "one dimension", but you catch my drift. The prospect of being a "professional blogger" could get old very quickly. For the record, I'll opt out. I'd rather get paid to talk aloud about what I write here.

And finally, the titles bit. It's beginning to get nauseating. Whatever you're used to elsewhere on the web, please leave it at the door when you get here. This talk of "our side" and "one of us" irks me. Nowhere in my bio or my "tagline" does it say anything about philosophical affiliation. There's a reason for this. If people come here with preconceived notions of what I'm all about, I lose them at the first sentence. My theory is, keep reading long enough, and you'll eventually figure it out. Must we announce everything?

I'm weary of labels because I think they should follow and not precede. You don't have to declare yourself to be anything. Just be "it", and if "it" is, people will recognize and call it as such. Only insecure ninnies need to be called something to feel validated in it. Lately, it seems like people are trying to catch up with their descriptors. Instead of just being, they announce. "Ooh! Ooh! Look at me, I'm a Conservative, I'm a Conservative." To them I say, "Do you want a cookie?"

I'll use a most perfect example--Jesus didn't run around telling people He was the messiah. He just was the messiah. And in season, the fullness of His character was revealed even to those who'd become common with Him.

People should have to work for their titles, not vice versa. I don't want mine until I deserve it.

And now I will draw a correlation that will bother some. Oh well, tough cookies. Jesus walked a path that we could follow (and contrary to popular belief, this "walk" didn't look much like Kanye West's). Just as Jesus was who He was designed to be, so shall I also be--me.

I don't pretend to know the end from the beginning, but I know one thing for sure: I won't be defined by this weblog.

In 2005: New design, conceptual re-vamp, more stuff, more writers, lots more bothering.

Thanks for reading kids.

 

Okay so my last radio interview on Rabbi Daniel Lapin's show is up online. They had me on for about 45 minutes so it's not exactly quick listening. Rabbi Lapin heads up an organization called Toward Tradition.

I'll give you the link with one disclaimer: in her excitement, my interviewer was very nice, but admittedly started off the interview talking over me quite a bit so it sounds like we're competetively talking. You know how it is when someone asks you a question and then interrupts you when you try to answer. She eases off towards the remainder of the interview, but anyway, there you have it.

I think you may need the evil Windows Media Player to listen, and pardon the commercials: Toward Tradition Interview.

P.S. For all you who sent me pronounciations. You are correct, "Nykol" is pronounced "Knee-cole" and hence the site is "knee-kola".

 

I haven't done one of these in awhile.

I can probably count on one hand the number of times each year I physically walk into a movie theater to watch a film. This is generally because I'm protective of my time, and if I'm going to veg out for two and a half hours in a dark room with sticky floors and a heavy-breather/loud popcorn eater sitting on my right, smacking on bonbons like it's their last meal on earth, (no offense against heavy-breathers), it had better be worth my while. Seeing "Men in Black II" on the big screen makes you change your whole attitude about movie going.

For this reason alone, I usually catch most flicks on DVD. I don't watch scary movies because call me crazy, but I like to be able to walk from my car to my front door at night without envisioning random and far-fetched scenarios I just had fed to me via some poorly written thriller whose suspense rests solely on the intensity of the musical score.

So understand when I say "disturbing" I don't necessarily mean scary. Although everyone I know put the film "Se7en" (which I haven't seen) in both categories. My list of most disturbing films is probably odd to some, but when I see something that's not right, it irks me. Below are a few more recent films I could have happily done without. Not because of the quality, but only because of the content:

• Closer - (I should've read the synopsis first) The human search for significance. Sex. Lies. It was off on so many levels.
  
• American Beauty - This film disgusts me. If this is a snapshot of the American family, we have much to fear.
  
• A Beautiful Mind - I know it won an academy award and all, but the man needed more than medication.
  
• Bamboozled - This film was promising, then about halfway through, Spike Lee got messy with his message and jacked it all up.
  
• Junior - A man giving birth. It's just wrong.
  
• Terms of Endearment - I haven't made it through this movie without cringing
  
• Open Waters - One word: sharks.
  
• The Nutty Professor (don't hate) - fat people have feelings too

Spare me further disappointment by naming other disturbing films.

 

It occurred to me today that no aspect of my being can comprehend the type of spiritual warfare (yeah I said it) that the President of the United States faces in his position of authority. Heading up the most powerful nation in the world (and professedly a "Christian" nation at that) is no small feat, and if we're wise and take heed to the words of 1 Timothy 2, we'd spend less time berating our leaders and more time praying for them. It'd only be to our own benefit if we did. And yes this would apply if Clinton were still in office as well. The real war in this world can't be seen with human eyes.

No need for comments. If you know God, just pray.

 

Rebel: Ben Shapiro

Age: 20

Representing: Burbank, CA

Why You Should Fear Him: I'm not one to get muddled in the specifics of why I disagree with a person politically. A rebel is defined as someone who has countered the culture and done the complete opposite of what this country expects of us. When somebody's bad (it's slang ya'll), I give them their props. Ben Shapiro is bad.

He entered UCLA at age 16 and is now enrolled at Harvard Law school. At age 17, he became the youngest nationally syndicated columnist. Today, a syndicated columnist he remains. In addition, Shapiro released his first book last year, "Brainwashed: How Universities Indoctrinate America's Youth."

He's appeared regularly on numerous radio shows and done speaking engagements across the country. For four years, he was a staunch and outspoken conservative on the politically correct UCLA (we protest everything) campus. He's willing to take unpopular stances in spite of much opposition.

Status: First year Harvard Law student.

Accomplishments: (From Shapiro's bio) He was hired in the summer of 2001 by the advertising team that had run George W. Bush's presidential campaign, writing copy for its planned ad campaign in support of Israel. His controversial columns in the UCLA Daily Bruin have been reprinted nationwide on many major websites, and he has been the featured guest on the Larry Elder Show (KABC, Los Angeles).

He was one of six winners of the worldwide Princeton University Ten-Minute Play Contest for High School Juniors in 1998-99. Shapiro is also a virtuoso violinist, having begun his training at age 5. He has played at numerous political events in his home city of Los Angeles.

Press/Interviews: Ben's Website , Town Hall Columns

Other Rebels: Erika Harold, Farrah Gray, Hans Zeiger, Adam Hunter, Dwight Howard, Sheri Valera, Princella Smith