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Today, I'm headed on a brief business trip to Southern California. This begins a rather long stretch of travel for me. Strangely enough, I doubt that will keep me from posting since leaving home always brings new insights, revelation, and unsuspecting fashion victims. Plus, having my trusty iBook with me keeps me close to one of my favorite places in the world (besides Jesus' bosom of course), that'd be the internet. I'm looking forward to posting via my various satellites.

A snapshot of my current life:
- You know life is pathetic when you actually look at business travel as a vacation.

- You know it's time for re-evaluation when you're standing in the middle of your studio apartment thinking, "Boy I sure could use a housekeeper". To my credit, it's a huge studio. Still doesn't change the pitifulness of that last notion.

P.S. Thanks to those who gave website change recommendations. I am taking every last one of them into account.

P.P.S. I've been hiding from my comments the last couple of days, I know. For those who've dropped some good thoughts in a comment section, I'll be responding to comments when I get into my hotel room.

 

I said it from the get-go. When New Jersey Governor McGreevey declared last week that he was, "A Gay American" he spoke more than just words, he spoke strategy. I read a recent op-ed on Town Hall that better articulates the significance of McGreevey's statement. Columnist Dennis Prager writes in the piece The 'I am a gay American' defense,

"Threatened with a sexual harassment lawsuit by his alleged male lover, having appointed him, a thoroughly unqualified man, as homeland security advisor at a time when America, in particular, the New York metropolitan area, is threatened with horrific terror and with any number of other instances of corruption already revealed and more likely to come out, Governor McGreevey saw the future and realized he had to resign from office.

But the way he did it was a masterstroke. He turned opprobrium into compassion.

He did it with one sentence. "I am a gay American."

On the face of it, it is irrelevant to whatever wrongs he may have committed against his state, his wife or his religion. But he did so because he knew that it would immediately deflect attention from his actions to his sexual orientation.

And then he would receive at least as much understanding and compassion as condemnation.
Why?

Because the moment he announced he was gay, people assumed that he did what he did because a homophobic society forced him, a homosexual, to live a fraudulent heterosexual life."

Exactly. Taking advantage of the double-standard we have in our society for proper relationships, McGreevey has positioned himself for a parachute landing. Praeger goes on to discuss past instances where the American public has pardoned certain behaviors in the case of homosexuality that wouldn't have otherwise been viewed the same way in heterosexual relationships. Prager ultimately decides that no one should be forced to resign from office because they commit an infidelity. I say surely we would have far fewer people in government if this were at all consistently actionable.

It's somewhat of a slippery slope. Be that as it may, McGreevey's decision (or coercion depending on your view) to resign as he did leaves a lot of issues up in the air. Given the circumstances and apparent double-standard, people are already speculating about the shadiness of his dealings. Then again, the rest of America is still fixated on those three words so strategically spoken, as I'm sure McGreevey is pleased to observe.

 

Since the National Review article, I've decided to embrace the title of "playful philosopher" for what it's worth.

On the subject of Talking, Slang, the English Language, and all points in between, I've enlisted (or he's enlisted me, it's all debatable) the help of grad-student, English connoisseur, and fellow member of the Conservative Brotherhood, Avery Tooley for a tag-team effort. Avery has a great grasp of the English language and a slightly different background than myself. Who knows how long it will last (probably until we have both talked ourselves into a tizzy), and I don't expect we'll agree on everything (since he is after all, a prescriptivist), but it should be fun and thought-provoking nonetheless.

He responds.

 

Oreo, Banana, the nicknames, right along with ideologies get old. When Mattel served up Oreo Barbie, I can't help but wonder what on earth they were thinking. Somewhere, there's an entire research and development team that needs to be fired. There is of course, the other, irreverent, and inappropriate side of me that can only chuckle since "Oreo" is a term with which I am closely acquainted (not wanting to assume anything, "Oreo" is the preferred term for a black person who's "white inside"). This Barbie doll was of course, immediately recalled from the market, but it serves as a great reminder of a prevalent ideology we have in our society. It's the idea that a person's behaviors are indicative of the color of their skin. A few weeks back I discussed the notion of "Acting White", within the context of education. Another piece to this complicatedly sick puzzle is speech and diction. The idea of "talking white" has been a lifelong battle for me. I've been accused of it, defended it, refuted it, and now, I shall attempt to explain it.

Standard English Language
Before delving into this complicated topic, I think it's worthwhile to clarify a few terms and ideas. As I understand it, there are three ways in which a person could be accused of the heinous crime of "talking white". The focus of what I refute is the first, since it's more largely recognized. To "talk white" usually means to speak in standardized English (whatever that is). For the sake of discourse, let's just say a working knowledge of the information contained in Strunk & White's Elements of Style should be in order for anyone who presumes to take on the "proper" usage of our great and almighty English language.

I grew up in the Pacific Northwest where interesting dialect is seriously lacking. Unlike the South, where you can find hicks with worse sentence structure than the average fourth-grader, here in the land of Microsoft, we over-enunciate syllables, and use big dictionary words we don't understand. When I went to college, speech was the first thing I was teased about amongst my black New Yorker friends, who dropped off the ends of words like bad habits. I was told I had an accent and spoke "proper". Proper of course, by default indicates that any other type of language besides standardized Strunk & White English is uncivilized. Just who perpetuated that myth?

I reject the aforementioned definition of "talking white" because standardized English is just that: standard. It's the commonly and widely recognized norm our society has chosen as a means of communication. This doesn't mean it's the best form (although I've had English teachers who would lay their lives down for this cause), or necessarily the "right" form, but it is the form, and a person would be ignorant and lofty to think they could be so flippant as to trounce upon its rich history and respect by walking into a job interview and dropping street slang.

That said, our reverence for the standardized English language as "god" goes borderline gluttony in higher academia as I recall once, I attempted to start flipping through a few doctoral theses for my own reading pleasure. Standard English is one thing -- high-falutin', snotty, over-intellectualized, and self-absorbed writing and talking is quite another. I'm no linguist, but I'm smart enough to know we haven't "arrived" in the current state of the English language. We owe much homage to the rich cultural history from which many of our words derive their origin. Okay, there I said it, moving on.

Rhetoric
The second way a person can be accused of "talking white" is based on rhetoric. Since I reject the notion of using standardized English as being a "white attribute", I will say that I can accept the idea that certain language or words may warrant the title of "white speech" or "black speech" or whatever other culture from which a word or expression may find its root. We've all heard the term "Ebonics" or Standardized Black Vernacular (both terms I reject), but I recently came across a plainly stated and thought-provoking piece by English nerd Avery Tooley on this very topic. Read it, and then pop an Aspirin.

I am brave enough to say that there just might be some "black expressions" and "white words" and everything in between. There are certain words or idiomatic expressions that sprout out from varying cultures. Everyone say it with me now, "This is okay".

Example one: I'm a big fan of Yiddish. The intent, the clean vulgarity of it all, wrapped up in its straight forward nature are just fitting to my personality. I'm not sure why, but there are times I'd like to renounce my Gentile status and take that passage of scripture that speaks to being "grafted in" as literal and assume my position as a full-blown Messianic Jew; and then I woke up. My fantasies of being a Jewish girl aside, Yiddish expressions stand alone as far from standardized English, definitively non-blonde-haired-blue-eyed, yet clear and somewhat accepted in communication interspersed with what we call Standard English.

Example two: When I was a teenager, I did a bit of acting and once landed myself in a Cap'n Crunch Christmas Crunch commercial (I'm going to break my contract by saying don't ever buy the stuff it's wretchedly bad I tell you). In one scene, myself and the other white boy in the commercial were supposed to yell out exclamations of excitement over this very awesome, unique, (and wholesome) cereal set before us as Cap'n Crunch in a Santa Hat (really just a cardboard cut out since he's digitally added in the editing room) pranced around us shouting, "Merry Christmas". My first line in the sequence was to exclaim, "RAD!" Yes, that's right, "rad" r-a-d, rad. Granted it was 1995, but as far as I was concerned, black people did not say "rad". That was a term reserved only for blonde-California-surfer-dude-Saved-by-the-Bell-Zack Morris types, of which I was not one. I marched myself right over to the director and informed him of this blasphemous mistake. There was no way on God's green Earth Ambra was going on national television to declare that anything, let alone a brand of cereal was "Rad". I re-negotiated the word "cool" into the script and all was well with the world. My point, however, being that in order to keep the commercial believable (HA!), we had to remain true to cultural expression.

Vocal Intonation
The third way a person can be accused of "talking white" is solely based on their vocal intonation. God's humanity is so deep and wide, we'd all be fools if we thought every last one of us would come out of the womb sounding the same. I don't think it's racist, inflammatory, or insensitive to suggest that as a whole, black people (like many other races) have a distinct sound to their voice. Even being raised in the same surroundings, two people of different ethnic backgrounds are not guaranteed to sound the same. There are times I can talk to someone on the phone or hear them on the radio and tell they're sure enough "a brotha" based on the sound of their voice alone. This is of course, not always the case. When someone breaks this stereotype *cough* Alan Keyes, we brand them as "white-sounding". In a few cases, I would concur, but it usually has absolutely nothing to do with words, intellect or rhetoric. It's purely based on vocal intonation.

Language is an interesting thing. For whatever reason, as a society we've decided on what is socially acceptable and what is not. This is fine, since that is of course the inherent nature and purpose of a society. However, I think the idea of language is in desperate need of more intelligent discourse. We need to do a little bit of talking about talking.

Based on my above definitions, I don't "talk white".

I speak in proper English most of the time. There is nothing about proper English that equates itself to whiteness. In addition, I tailor the English language to fit me or whatever idea I'm out to express. I like to throw in common slang in the midst of plain old words. I'm one of those people who can change up my language style in a matter of seconds. I have a preferred way of speaking, however being thrown from environment to environment has given me a broad scope of language and its uses. Depending on the situation, certain protocol is in order. When I'm at the office and I answer my phone, I recognize what's appropriate. When I'm addressing a group of young people, I can often get their attention by dropping a loose expression they wouldn't expect me to know (conservative nerd that I am) in the midst of standard English.

I am a firm believer in the prolific nature of the English language. Most people haven't even mastered that. Everyone should have the foundation of standard English and an understanding of its grammatical elements. However, from there on, people should be free to choose the manner in which they choose to express themselves at any given time, yet knowing that there are consequences for their choice of speech in any given situation. Teaching standardized English effectively is the biggest hurdle for our school systems to jump. Even in a perfect world, with a mass of students well-versed in standardized English, black kids will still be accused of "talking white". The bigger picture is human nature's continual attempt to make distinctions. The distinctions are there, but they have less to do with education and intellect, and more to do with environment and expression.

After-Thought
A few weeks ago, I came upon a jewel on the internet called the Urban Dictionary. I was
enthralled for about two hours. It's probably one of the more intelligent things
I've come across in awhile. People were dissecting street slang, and other commonly socially unacceptable expressions with grammatical elements. Not only do you have to be creative to do this, you have to be smart too. The focus on equipping this next generation with an understanding of standardized English will be important. Nevertheless, I caution us that when we do this, we should expect to see even more slang and butchering of our highly revered lexicon as my generation is intent on breaking out of the box in everything. Language will be one of them.

 

There's lots of talk these days about Jesus being a so-called liberal. Ascribing modern-day political affiliations to historical Biblical figures (more specifically, the central figure to all humanity and King of Kings and Lord of Lords) is just plain blasphemous and self-serving. I have also heard it said that Jesus was for social justice. In fact, even I have said this myself. Although, I said it with the caveat that the idea of "social justice" as we know it today is not exactly indicative of the true heart and spirit of mobilization and empowerment I saw in Jesus' ministry. Unfortunately, today the words "social justice" conjure up the sensation of dry heaving libcrap.

Some weeks back, in part three of my epic saga "Why I'm Not a Republican" I mentioned my disappointment in much of the Republican party's attention to the yes, dare I say it, the disenfranchised. That opinion still stands. Is it the government's job to feed the poor, heal the sick, and set the captives free? Well, no. However, it is their job to facilitate an atmosphere where outside agencies can move effectively in this respect. In order for this to take place, actually recognizing the problems of our society is necessary.

Here in Seattle, we have this nomadic homeless camp called "Tent City". They go around Washington, copping lawn space (by permission) to establish their literal "tent city" of homeless people. Generally, it is churches that offer up their property for the nearly 70 homeless people to live on for an agreed amount of time. Much uproar has been made as Tent City once existed in the inner-city, but has now begun making its way into the lovely Seattle suburbs; home of the card-carrying Republican. They are not happy.

I am merely using the issue of homelessness as an example of one of the epidemics facing our society right now. And let's be honest, if your city is anything like mine, being "homeless" has become somewhat in vogue. On an average day, you might see some trusafarian white kid with university tuition fully-paid, sitting on the street corner panhandling because it's "cool", or because they've disowned their parents. I have written in the past about my complete lack of tolerance for anyone who is unwilling to get off their tail and make life happen.

I offer the Tent City analogy for a reason. Recently, City Council approved a plan for Tent City to occupy space in Woodinville, Washington; a community with million dollar homes. They were outraged, as I may be too, although watching their outrage has been far more entertaining and indicative than anyone would have thought. There is however, a greater picture here; It's the idea of being forced to deal with the poor. There was once a time when on any given day, I could arrange to locate myself in a place where I wouldn't be forced to deal with the decay of American society on a daily basis. These days, it's everywhere.

So what is social justice? What is our responsibility to it? And who's leading the pack?

 

I'm headed to church, but this morning decided I'm sick of the "Urban Outfitters" feel of the site. I'm in the process of changing my publishing platform to MovableType which is more stream-lined, effective, and organized. For this reason, I'm currently in re-configuration HADES. That's okay though because chaos is a comfortable place for me. So I'll be adding categories, expanded commenting capabilities, and all that jazz.

While I'm at it, I figured I oughta consider once again re-designing this little alcove on the web and thought I'd seek out any advice on changes, or additions you'd like to see this next go 'round. This should be the last re-design for awhile.

Please be gentle on me, I designed this one myself.

 

Am I the last one to know this was happening on September 13th? Dr. Phil eat your heart out.

 

By happenstance, I found Planned Parenthood's teen outreach site Teenwire today. Yes I realize I am probaby VERY late on the uptake, but I've had the sincere privilege of having few personal acquaintances with the organization. First thoughts when I saw the site: WHAT. IN. TARNATION?? From body diagrams to articles on intersex (clearly something I'm not familiar with as I had to click the link but it seems that being a boy or a girl is not dependent on what's between your legs), a "Queer or Quesetioning" section along with the much frequented "Frequently Asked Questions". Of which, I will post a few:

Dear Experts,

Can you be too fat to have sex? I really want to and I'm not fat, but I'm not a size 6. I'm a size 11 and am I too big to have sex? Can sex still be enjoyable if you're not as skinny?

Answer: Sex can be enjoyable for people of any size!

Dear Experts,

Hello, me and my boyfriend are ready for sex but we don't exacly know which protection we need. Do we only use a condom? What protection do we use?

Answer: Congrats on taking the first step to discussing protection - very smart thinking! Communication is one of the most important parts of being in any relationship, especially if it's a sexual one.

You need to decide which risks you are willing to take - and which ones you aren't. Condoms offer good protection against many sexually transmitted infections. Hormonal birth control methods, such as the Pill or the injection Depo Provera, offer the better protection against pregnancy - but they provide no protection against infection.

Dear Experts,

Hi. I am a bisexual, but i dont want people to know. I just want my partners to know. Is this wrong?

Answer: No. Coming out is a very personal decision. It is up to each person to decide if and when to come out, and who to come out to. Just keep in mind that it's totally normal to be bisexual. There are many people who have sex play with both girls and guys.

Dear Experts,

I want to know if it's too young for a 13-year-old girl to get pregnant?

Answer: There isn't a specific age that is the right time for a woman to get pregnant and raise a child...

Planned Parenthood, always good for enlighting the minds of the youth.

 

I suppose if it's not one thing, it's another. This time, it's Bill Cosby. Have I mentioned lately how much I love that man? Continuing his crusade to rally the black community to accountatbility and responsiblity, Cosby spent Wednesday night speaking at New Hope Baptist Church in Newark, NJ. The event featured other panelists including three doctors, a reverend (a real one), and a Rutgers University professor.

Cosby's interest in the area was peaked when last April, several prominent Newark city gangs (clearly the Bloods and the Crips) agreed to end all the bloodshed that had once destroyed their community. The Star-Ledger reports,

They [former gang-bangers] also formed an organization, Saving Our Selves, to reduce gang violence. Since then, the group has been working with residents at Baxter Terrace, a public housing development where gang members have been doing neighborhood cleanup.

Well surely something is going right in the great state of New Jersey. If only they knew "firebrand Ambra" was on her way there via business in a week or so...perhaps I can stir up something news-worthy.

If you hear something wacky from the depths of NJ in a few weeks, you'll know it was me. Unless of course, it wasn't. The world may never know.

 

Joining Bill Clinton in the ranks of shameful political infidelity, New Jersey Governor James E. McGreevey today announced he cheated on his wife with another man. Boy if I had a nickel for every time this happened in government but never made it to press, I'd be Oprah right about now. The nature of politics has produced a literal lot of individuals very skilled at concealing scandalous things. However, this time, McGreevy was caught. The New York Daily News reports,

In a stunning declaration, Gov. James E. McGreevey announced his resignation Thursday and acknowledged that he had an extramarital affair with another man.

"My truth is that I am a gay American," he said.

"Shamefully, I engaged in adult consensual affairs with another man, which violates my bonds of matrimony," the married father of two said. "It was wrong, it was foolish, it was inexcusable."

Somewhere in Democratland, the tables will be turned and McGreevey's going to made to look like a victim. "Wrong, Foolish, and inexcusable" is right. The NY Daily News may have hit the nail on the head, although probably inadvertently when they reported,

"The Democrat said his resignation would be effective Nov. 15. McGreevey said he would step down because his secret -- both his sexuality and his affair -- leaves the governor's office vulnerable."

You're darn right it does. Wide open. America is still repairing the damage that was done via the Clinton scandal. Leaders of other people don't get the privilege of living their lives they way they want. When will we get hip to this concept?

A few quick observations and I'm done: Use of the phrase "My truth". Red flag for moral relativism as it indicates that truth varies from person to person. Also, I happen to find it interesting that he announced himself as a "gay American" (by the way, that was strategic). I'll leave that one alone for now.

[ Click to Read Complete Resignation Speech ]