Ambra: So Mr. Dickens, many people love and revere your work.
Dickens: Yes I know. I'm brilliant like that.
Ambra: Honestly, I thought you were kind of boring. I mean, some of your books were the best snoozefest of my middle school life.
Dickens: Well, you're certainly entitled to your opinion, but my family's estate is making millions from my work even to this day.
Dickens: I really never expected Great Expectations to do so well.
Ambra: I'm suprised it did.
Ambra: Be honest, was "Pip" really meant to be "pimp"?
Dickens: (laughs) Can you imagine him saying, "Pimp Sir. Pimp Pimp Sir" sounds like the latest Jay-Z chorus
Ambra: What you know about Jay-Z?
Ambra: But really though...Mrs. Havishan, the wedding dress? It was all a little creepy to me.
Dickens: I have to admit, I was on opium when I wrote that character in.
When I was applying to colleges five years ago, I got a lovely letter from a school called "St. John's College
" inviting me to apply. This school is scary. There are no majors, barely any teachers, all you do is read old (and a few new) books. It's like four years of reading every classic ever written. Fine for some, but for me, that would be H-E-double hockey sticks.
The thing is, in my opinion, no work of literature is exempt from criticism. If reading your book sucked one month out of my life, I'm entitled to say a thing or two in response to my lost time. One of these days, should I ever get around to writing a book, I will probably greatly regret that statement, but for now I'm just going to be flippant.
That said, a few readers have commented on their least favorite books and authors and as promised, I'm listing them. I've had english teachers who would have coronaries if they read this but oh well, they don't hold my fate anymore. Perhaps I should have changed the word "worst" to "over-rated". In any case, you said:
Virginia Woolf (that chick was a raving loony)
Maya Angelou (my addition)
Additional Worst & Over-Rated Books
- The Awakening by Kate Chopin
- Ethan Frome by Edith Wharton
- The Color Purple by Alice Walker
- Ulysses by James Joyce
- Moby Dick by Herman Melville
- Rabbit Run by John Updike
- Roots by Alex Haley
- Tar Baby by Toni Morrison
- Silas Marner by George Elliot
Anytime a book needs Cliff's notes, I think we're all in trouble.
P.S. this list should be much longer.