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Sometimes, life just pokes you. Life's little pokes run the gamut of expression. They manifest in major disappointments, setbacks, strained relationships, and both physical as well as emotional pain. We all know that pain can sometimes be good. It reminds us we're still alive and human. Pain also stretches us, gives us fortitude and helps us to grow in this grand thing we call life. There are hundreds of flowery words and deep insights we can give pain, but let's just be honest, sometimes it stinks. The stinkage of pain is far more pungent than the aroma of its virtues.

I spent the first two days of this week wallowing in the depths of my own extreme and total pitifulness, writhing in insane pain. This "good" pain I speak of was not what I was experiencing this time around. No, this was bad pain. This was very bad pain. This was the make-you-want-to-slap somebody type pain. This was that pain that keeps you up at all hours of the night, thanking hallucinations of Nick-at-Nite executives for producing another Cosby Show marathon, sleeping on the couch because you never made it to the bed, and counting the dots on the popcorn ceiling because it takes too much energy and focus to close your eyes to sleep and that "energy" would be better spent wide-awake fighting off the evil pain monsters that haunt in the night. This is also the pain that would graciously allow very enticing opportunities like, "Hey let's go shoe-shopping, all-expenses paid, my treat!" to ease on down the road. This was the pain that kept a wordy writer such as myself silent for two days.

It seems in spite of my obsessive compulsive flossing, brushing, rinsing, impeccable attention to my teeth, "nice smile" (I've been told), regular check-ups, and two horrendous years of braces, I somehow ended up in an upset tooth predicament, which consequently, landed me in the dentist chair on Tuesday morning, getting a gosh darn root canal. That's right, a root canal. Nevermind the fact that my bionic-teeth possessing younger brother (who by the way, admittedly went YEARS without ever brushing his teeth) has never had even a minuscule cavity in his entire annoying little life. He got the good genes. Instead, all my hard dental upkeep ever reaped was the reward of a sugar-free lollipop given to me by the dental assistant upon my departure from having the crap kicked out of my gums.

The precursor to this tragic Tuesday morning event included the right side of my face swelling up to the size of a small Russian village (a well-fed one at that) and me collapsed on my parents' understuffed family room couch, pleading with the God of mercy to "just take me now". I'm hardly a dramatic person (she says under the influence of vicodin), but seriously, this one ranks right up there next to the time I broke my arm in two places and the doctor "set" it back into place with no medication, using only the death grip of his hands and the force of his upper knee.

Now I'll be the first to wail on the evils of the pharmaceutical industry, but this week I have a newfound respect, honor, and admiration for the makers of vicodin. Vicodin is now my special pain-relieving friend. Even now, when I think of it, I want to cry tears of thanksgiving and joy. Oddly, this comes from the mouth of the same person who only two months ago said one of the privileges of being a child of God is "healing any time we want". Instead, I committed the ultimate sin and worshipped the glory vicodin. I know I need to get on my knees and repent for my horrible idolotry, and trust me, I will. I guess at this point the least I can do is thank God for creating the men and women who thought up the brilliance of vicodin.

Now let's get real. With the baby-boomers heading into the last quarter of life, "futurists" and people with common sense are predicting that the next trillion-dollar business is the health and wellness industry. Pharmaceutical companies know this and they'll do their darndest to keep people buying into the hype until the grave. Did you ever notice how on those commercials for the latest "cholesterol-lowering, nasal-drip clearing, allergy-ridding, sex drive-raising" medication, the end script goes something like this,

"Side-effects may include: gas with oily discharge, damage to the liver, diziness, blindness, nausea, numbness, head lice, heart murmors, internal bleeding, brain swelling, small pox, and ultimately, death.

Here's to hoping that last symptom doesn't happen on their watch. Interestingly enough, most people these days take medication to treat symptoms and side-effects but not the root cause of their illness. The fact that someone has to sacrifice a healthy liver for the sake of low-cholesterol is just heinous.

What would happen if all of a sudden people started getting well? What if our need for these modern-day, manufactured, synthetic chemicals we call "drugs" was obliterated? Surely a host of individuals would be out of work and a handful would be out of a fortune. The ploy of many a pharmaceutical company to keep people sick and dependent on drugs for relief is elusively wicked. I suppose the installation of the Food and Drug Administration is an attempt to bring checks and balances to our commerce of legal medication. Some days I wonder just which members of the FDA are in bed with top drug-producing companies. Then again, I weigh all my suspicions against the backdrop of my suppressed conspiracy theorist tendencies so of course everything is fair game for "overreactor" labeling.

Still, healing is a way better remedy for life's pokings.

[The author apologies for the trivial, self-centered nature of this rant. Generally requisite monthly rants deal with more pertinent issues however considering the influence she was under, it is certain you understand the deal. Past Monthly Rants: June, April ]

 

Okay, this is known as genuine stalling.  I've got a couple of things lined up for today, however nykola.com headquarters has been majorly under the weather and a bit doped up this week.  Thankfully, no amount of vicotin could stop this tripe from running through my brain:

Conservative Eye for the Hippie Guy
This show takes a team of 5 young, smart Republicans and travels to the corners of the United States spreading good cheer, finding unsuspecting hippie guys who need their wardrobe spruced up a bit.  Hippie Liberals turn in their tie-dye for the staple navy blue suit and red power-tie.  On this week's episode, the latest subject of the Fab-Five breaks down crying when they tell him he has to throw out his "Impeach Bush" signs.

Who Wants to Be a Billionaire?
Theresa Heinz-Kerry agrees to give away part of her fortune if you agree to vote for her husband.

The Whore
Who wants to be the next Capitol Hill Whore?  Do you have what it takes to be a certified, Washington, brazen hussy?  Then you could be the next Capitol Hill Whore.  Join 15 other contestants competing for a spot as the next biggest whore!  Each week, via a number of challenges, contestants face off in the "whoreroom" where Bill Clinton also known as "The Bill" will be "firing" someone each week with the help of his staff which includes "Jessica "Washingtonienne" Cutler among others.  The goal is to narrow down the contestants to help further their careers.

Add your suggestions as you see fit....back in the groove later today.

 

There's nothing worse than having a temporary physical deformity the first time you meet complete strangers.  I suppose it could've been worse. I could've had the chicken pox or a bad hair-dyeing experience, but no, Sunday morning I woke up looking like the Godfather.  My right cheek was swollen to abnormality.  It seems I had an irritation that caused the swelling and I was less than thrilled.  As you may recall,  Sunday was the first ever Seattle Blognic where a variety of Seattle area bloggers and readers came together to eat meat.  To the veg-types, this is known as a barbecue.  Despite my better judgment, I made the decision to go dressed as Marlon Brando and I'm glad I did.  In spite of my ailment and bulging cheeks, a good time was had by all.  There's nothing like realizing that indeed piles of flesh and bones do exist behind these virtual realities we call weblogs.  If more people realized this they might cut back on the hate mail.

I know I said I'd take pictures, but for the first time ever on this weblog, I lied.  I'm certain you understand however, that it would take an honest day in Jesse Jackson's office before my swollen, bee-stung face was going anywhere near a camera yesterday.  Thus ends my personal drama.

It was purely enjoyable to meet some of Seattle's finest thinkers in the blogosphere.  The event was organized by the very hip Matt Rosenberg of Rosenblog, the very much down-to earth Stefan Sharkansky of Shark's Blog, and the just plain nice and gracious Brian Crouch of Medved Fans (who by the way, also has a gorgeous wife).  Meeting peoples' spouses, kids and dogs was quite an experience.  In addition, receiving feedback and discussing blogging was humbling as always.  Strangely, I did get asked twice if I was considering running for some sort of political office.  Errr, absolutely, unequivocally not.  I also realized that I had no idea how to pronounce my own website.  So for everyone's info, Nykola.com is pronounced (Nee-Cole-Uh), like the "N" version of the cough drop "Ricola".  (You have to sing it for the full effect).  I know, not exactly catchy, but unlike some people, I never thought this thing all the way through.

So all that said, it was a good day and I look forward to doing it again sometime.  Maybe next go 'round we'll bring in the Liberals.  Now that would be grand ole party.

Stefan's got a more comprehensive recap of all who attended.  [Gushing] He even called me lovely and talented! [/Gushing]  I'm just eternally grateful no one took pictures.

 

Yo (throw-back to the 80's) I'm signing off for the weekend. My nerd-butt is exhausted, spent, fidgety, and anxious to enjoy the Seattle sun (a true rarity).

This Sunday, all things pending, I'm attending a "Blognic". The gathering shall consist of local Seattle bloggers and readers. So if you live in the Seattle area and are a reader and/or blogger. I'd encourage you to come out, eat some bbq and meat, I mean meet some internet personalities in person (details are included in the link above).

I must say, this shall be odd. I'm still a little new to the whole net-relationship thing. Trust me, I'm blacker than I appear on the web (Okay I just cracked myself up on that one).

I'll be sure to take pictures. Enjoy the weekend everyone. I'll still be chiming in on comments.

 

I'm not a violent person really, but when it comes to certain things, I would probably be a good defense for gun control. I've long had issues with sex education and this is why, Teacher Has Kids Tasting Flavored Condoms. WorldNetDaily reports

"The New Mexico Health Department is standing behind a sex-education teacher in Santa Fe who encouraged ninth-graders to taste flavored condoms."

Quick, somebody get me my pistol because if a teacher had my child's tongue anywhere near a condom, it might get ugly. And here we conservatives are with "abstinence education" as the only thing to offer. I think some lessons in critical thinking would help as well. This type of behavior, this is what I mean when I say conservatives lack a certain assertiveness. These educators these days are downright bold.

When my brother was in eighth grade, he took some form of "sex education" (in a private school mind you) and came home one day with a goodie bag care of the evil spawn of Satan at Planned Parenthood. Included among the condoms and other paraphernalia no 13-year-old boy should have, were a few bumper stickers with condoms on them that read "Just Wear It". Yeah, safe to say, those suckers went in the trash. It hasn't been that long since I was in seventh grade and even I don't recall classes being this graphic. When my younger sister took health class, her text book had two whole chapters on "what to do when you're a boy but you feel like a girl" or vice versa. Keep in mind, nowhere in the text did it say "seek help" or "be concerned". I confiscated that book from her and kept it for future ammunition.

Schools shouldn't even be attempting to teach kids about a topic that belongs in the family. Unfortunately, in a culture where the family is in disarray, someone must, and our educational system (public and private) has failed miserably with relativism and humanistic philosophies because even they don't know what they believe. And where is the church? Where they normally are when the subject really counts: sleeping, or waiting for Jesus to take us to heaven.

Although the Santa Fe school is standing behind the teacher, in the past, condom demonstrations have accounted for a few teachers being suspended or even fired. You may recall last year, a Florida teacher was fired for doing a condom demonstration that included mood lighting, music, and a banana. But that's only when parents speak up. And how active are most parents in their kids schools? Not.

Believe it or not, many school districts are actually hungry for solutions in the area of sex education, but the people who bring something tangible to the table get first dibs. Those people are usually blood-thirsty liberals. Even Europe is after solutions (now that's amazing). A Forbes article released yesterday noted the successes and failures of a peer-led sex education program in the United Kingdom,

"A school-based sex education program taught by older students helped girls delay their first intercourse.

But the program didn't have a similar impact on boys, and it didn't increase the likelihood the teens would use protection, reports a study in the July 24 issue of The Lancet.

The study by the British researchers was prompted by concern that the United Kingdom has the highest under-18 pregnancy rates in western Europe. The researchers evaluated sex education programs taught to 13- and 14-year-olds by 16- and 17-year-olds, and compared them to the more traditional programs led by teachers. They assigned 8,000 students in 27 schools to either a peer-led group or a teacher-led group.

By age 16, fewer girls from the peer-led group reported intercourse than girls in the teacher-led group; 35 percent of the peer-taught girls said they were having sex, compared to 41 percent of the teacher-led students.

No differences were found among the boys in either group. Thirty-three percent of the boys in the peer-led programs and 31 percent in the teacher-led sessions had sex for the first time before age 16."

Researchers said the goal of the project was to increase the number of teens practicing safe sex (whatever that is). The program helped "delay" girls' first intercourse? Dear God we've lowered our standards if this seems like a good thing. Then again, many places in Europe are as lewd as they come so it doesn't shock me their teenage pregnancy rate is so high. I suppose anything would be progress for a place like Amsterdam.

If people expect the next generation to begin at a better place than our parents left off, this issue should be of top priority to everyone. I think I'm going to expound on this come Monday, there's another article about teenage sexual activity and the lack thereof that's peaked my interest.

 

With the announcement this month that they'd be releasing the cheaper version of the iPod to the world, I am convinced Apple has plans to take over. I'm an avid Apple user myself, but admittedly, I initially bought my iMac and iBook because they were "pretty" and I didn't want a Dell hunk of ugliness in my house. Chicks. We're weird like that. The "Mac vs. PC" debate can get cut-throat and for the record, I use both. And for the record, I like Dell.

This Fall, Duke University is providing its entire freshman class with iPods. Now may be the time to reconsider this school as having more than just a kick-butt basketball team. The Durham Herald-Sun reports,

"The iPods, which can download and make use of both audio and text material, will come stocked with Duke-related downloads, including information for freshman orientation and the academic calendar. Duke also will create a special Web site modeled on the Apple iTunes site from which students will be able to download music and course content from faculty, including language lessons, recorded lectures and audio books.

Students in visiting assistant professor Lisa Merschel's elementary Spanish class will use the iPods to listen to audio examples of textbook exercises and hear Spanish songs.

And adjunct professor Sally Schauman's students will use their iPods to record lectures in class and interviews while out in the field for her freshman seminar about the ethics and science of urban water conservation."

Fear my generation. Fear them intensely. My younger siblings attend a private high school that has rolled-out the "lap-top program". The program requires all students to have a laptop as assignments are both given and submitted via the web. At my sister's graduation this Spring, one of her classmates parting words were,

"Don't ever take for granted a school that has its own server"

A six-year-old is hacking into your computer as we speak.

Hat tip (Joanne Jacobs)

 

Caught these thoughts on the Flag-Burning Amendment and freedom and democracy by way of Hot Abercrombie Chick (ugh, dislike that name intensely) and thought it was on point,

Let's not be so simple-minded as to think that freedom and democracy always go hand in hand. Democracy has allowed laws promoting slavery, segregation, eugenics, and a whole host of other gross violation of individual freedoms because the voting majority was in support of them. If Democracy is such holy and unequivocally good institution, why do we have courts that can strike down majority-approved legislation? Right is right, wrong is wrong, and freedom is freedom no matter what a democratic majority supports. Is preventing people from telling me that I can't burn a flag on risk of imprisonment antithetical to democracy? Sure it is - so was Brown vs. the Board of Education. But to say it is antithetical to freedom is silly. It's that simple.

That's heat. Ya'll know how I feel about democracy...

 

You don't even have to be half-way coherent to recognize that the folks at PETA are off their ever animal-loving rockers. No, seriously. I often wonder just what exactly they are smoking over there in Norfolk, VA (PETA's headquarters). Yesterday, they announced the winners of the annual "World's Sexiest Vegetarian" as Outkast's Andre (washed-up) 3000 and "actress" Alicia Silverstone. There goes that word "sexy" again! In an interview, Andre 3000 aka Andre Benjamin said he'd spend his last day on earth eating broccoli. That's right, eating BROCCOLI. Does anyone find something wrong with this?

I'm cool with vegetarians (as long as they don't subscribe to the religion of vegetarianism), but vegans tend to be militant converts. They have lost all common sense and cannot even think straight. Then I see PETA's list of the other celebrity vegans and vegetarians competing for the title of "sexy" and I am miffed. B.B. King? Are you joking me? Then again, he is diabetic so I guess it makes sense.

Here's my piece on vegetarianism. If you're going to stop eating meat, fine. That is your prerogative. While I am against the social movement, I do realize that many people "go veg" for many reasons including health and well-being. You can enjoy your vegetables and have a great big vegetable party for all I care.

But please don't infringe upon my right to a double bacon cheeseburger anytime I see fit. In college, the day before Thanksgiving break began, the campus militants put anti-turkey flyers in every student's mailbox, right along with a lovely picture of a turkey being murdered. I was not pleased. Right then I knew, if ever a fight was gonna go down at Wesleyan University, it would be between me and the vegetarians. Anybody bold enough to try to come between me and thanksgiving turkey and stuffing was looking for an old-fashioned beat-down.

And another thing. If you're going to be a vegetarian, BE a vegetarian. I'm sick of seeing you people talk out of both sides of your mouth, eating chicken, fish, the likes of which qualify as MEAT if you ask me. "I'm a vegetarian, but I also eat fish." No. In that case you're not a vegetarian. You're a person who eats fish.

And when someone calls you out on your phony vegetarian identity, please don't lie. Just admit that like the majority of North America, you like meat. As you should. After all, it's here for your consumption.

You veggies can do what you want, but as for me and my house, we will serve steak!

Side note: There was a funny scene in the film Notting Hill where a woman claims she a "Frutarian". Meaning, she only eats fruits that have "fallen" from the tree naturally. Just where do we draw the line?

 

One of the subjects dearest to my heart is education. Funny to hear that coming from the mouth of a college drop-out, but it's true. If you want to engage me in a heated debate, start theorizing about our educational system.

Personally, there are times I feel I was missing out by never attending public school. As with most life-long privatized school beings, I started feeling the "itch" at the end of eighth grade when faced with the reality that after the summer, most of my friends would be entering the lovely socially diverse and wonderful sphere of public high school, while I'd be left with the whities, practicing the PSAT at a school with no wrestling team or cheerleaders, and only eight black people in my class. I am grateful for my education, however flawed it may have been, but there are times I wish I could go back and do things differently.

Over the last three or so years, I've come to the conclusion that I would have been a good candidate for homeschool. Both my parents worked so there was no way this could happen, but in a perfect world, I think this would have been my preferred method of learning. I have never been an enthusiastic classroom student. When it came to formalized education, I was a devout dualist. I treated school like a job. Teachers were the boss, my classmates, they were my associates and co-workers with whom I cracked jokes during the day but rarely spoke to or saw in the night, and who by the weekend, were merely figments of my imagination. I excelled in the arts and all the humanities (history, philosophy, social studies, religion) except English (go figure). Perhaps that could be the cause of my distaste for the classics. Since I've never been too fond of the three-part essay, most of my English teachers hated my writing, and I mean HATED. As for the mathematics and sciences, well, let's just say medical school has never once been even a faint consideration. It wasn't grades, but my love of knowledge and learning that was the driving motivation for me to think independently. High school was pretty boring for me and college was too. A more independent approach to learning would have probably worked well for me.

Homeschool advocates can be pretty diehard. Opposition to institutionalized education seems pretty futile to me. At this point, we've got to make something of our current schooling process. These days people have lots of philosophies about the classroom. Some good, others downright sac-religious. It's commonly known that studies show in secondary education, girls learn better in a less-competitive, all-female environment. I mostly agree, although being a black woman in a predominately white environment tends to be a bit different so this didn't really apply to me as I was rarely intimidated by the guys in my classes. Translate the same philosophy of female-dominated learning to higher education, and nowadays you get extreme feminism and lesbianism (I kid you not). The 2003 film Mona Lisa, Smile touched on this, although they barely treaded water in their plot. Your modern day, all-female institution of higher learning is no longer the place of "grooming" and "intellectualism" Radcliffe used to be. The halls of prestigious schools like Bryn Mawr, Mills, Scripps, Mt. Holyoke, Smith, and Wellesley (which produced none other than Senator Clinton herself), are steeped with man-hating, self-sufficient, feminist philosophies and liberal ideologies. I'd be kidding myself if I didn't admit that everyone in the "Seven Sisters" schools as we called them knows that they're churning out more lesbians than the film industry. There's a reason for that, but I digress.

Other studies have shown that people learn better in smaller classrooms. I suppose this is the privilege of private education. In elementary school, I rarely ever had a class over 19. In high school, our graduating class was about 130 which pales in comparison to senior classes of 400 and 500 students. I can definitely say the learning was more intimate and direct. In my case, I also chose a small, private college of only 2700 so the same was true most of my scholastic life. Although, in college I would have quite liked disappearing into the back row of a boring history seminar.

Smaller classrooms don't seem to be in the near future for most schools. Even if they were, there is a big piece of the learning puzzle many educators don't take into account--the family.

It is very easy for us conservatives to preach about how educating children should ultimately be the responsibility of the parents. I couldn't agree with this statement more as now more than ever I realize that no matter how great or horrible your education, your family's role in shaping your critical thinking can catapult you to the highest heights of academia if you allow it. I'm certain one can find the statistics to back all this up, but I'm not one of those people who climaxes on statistics, so at this point I'm going to speak on experience.

A recent New York Times article (registration required) discussed an inner-city Indianapolis elementary school that is suffering inside because of what's happening outside,

"At Riverside Elementary School here, students wander the halls. Several times last term, the police dragged out disorderly 11-year-olds in handcuffs. Crack dealers work the neighborhood, where four young men have been killed over the last year.

These are the obvious signs of a school in crisis. Yet there is a less visible but powerful condition that is both cause and symptom of Riverside's chaos. Its student body is in perpetual motion. In 2002-3, 437 children transferred into the school or moved away in midterm, far more than the school's total enrollment of 330.

'Every time rent comes due, some child leaves,' the principal, Donna Smith, said. 'Parents lose jobs. Kids get tossed back and forth between relatives. Children are moving in and out of the school all the time.'"

The single most influential aspect of childhood learning is the family structure. We can toss around thousands of different learning concepts, but when we fail to address the effects of many dynamics, we leave kids swimming against the current. This article is a stark reminder of the partnership schools must develop with the community in which their students reside.

My sophomore year of high school, I took a fabulous physics class that successfully whopped my behind. The class was predominately white and Asian, along with three of us blackies. About two weeks into the semester, it became painfull clear that "we" the black students were not doing as well as the rest of the class. We struggled with some of the basic concepts while the rest of the class excelled to more advanced work. Puzzled, I went on a discovery of sorts. I dismissed the conclusion that we just weren't "as smart" as bunk. I knew better than that since we all had better grades than most of our class. Some other force was at work. After picking apart my classmates brains, it hit me. The dinner table! The common denominator amongst most of the students in the class was the discussions that took place when their family ate dinner. While our black families discussed politics and other pertinent issues, they talked about their homework and physics equations with their parents. They had a built-in analysis and love of the sciences in the fabric of their family. Our lack of family dialogue made us have to work twice as hard to get a decent grade. This revelation changed the way I viewed learning.

Our teaching and classroom methods these days don't account for much of what they should.

 

This is probably the only time I will ever do anything like this on my website, but I have a favor to ask. When you get a chance, drop by my younger sister Amelia's fundraising site sendamelia.com. Following me in true rebellious fashion, she's deferring college to attend a year-long ministry leadership training program to gain focus, direction and a deeper relationship with God.

Unfortunately, my parents, being livid that she is postponing college, have decided to support this decision from afar (read: they ain't coughin' up any dough). I love and respect my parents very much, but sometimes they are very stubborn (and yes I know they will probably read this but that's okay, this is nothing I haven't already told them). So anyway, if you get a chance, and feel compelled, go and donate. She has to raise a great deal of funds in a short amount of time. I guarantee it's a legit-op, and she's a legit person (however looking rather like Angela Davis in this photo). If you can't donate, at least forward the link to someone who can!