April 05, 2004
An Open Letter to American Idol
*Warning. Lame, shallow, and remorsefully pitiful post*

To Whom It May Concern:

Last year I made perhaps one of the biggest mistakes of my life: I started watching your show, American Idol. Here I was, a renegade supporter of anti-reality television ideals and I fell off the proverbial television-addict wagon. I was never on the wagon to begin with so I suppose that's a bad expression. Let's just say, I was "run over" by the wagon. In fact, not only did the wagon run over me, it also dragged my body a couple miles and left me for dead. I'm not really much of a television watcher. I'm actually the nerd that watches Animal Planet, C-SPAN, and Nickelodeon (for Cosby Show re-runs of course). When the American Idol bug hit me last spring, Tuesday evenings at 8pm quickly became "very serious" to me. I found myself doing strange things like not answering my phone, cutting off communication with my friends and family, getting into perhaps one too many non-work-related debates on whether or not "Ruben will beat Clay", yelling at my television, eating dinner on the couch so I could be closer to the idol action, and running to get second servings during commercials. Don't be mistaken. I still got my dose of commercial indoctrination. Your show is a major corporation's dream. It's a beast of consumerism you've created, and it's also made one very washed up psuedo-celebrity, one British playboy, and one hokey black guy mighty rich. This third season of your show really had me hooked.

Well, I've done some flesh-searching (that'd be the even more carnal version of "soul-searching"), and it has ocurred to me that I can no longer worship at the idol (no pun intended) of Fox's Talent Trippery. Time is a rather precious thing and I once again "re-discovered" my need of every bit of it (including that 1 hour time slot on Tuesday nights). I also "re-discovered" the fact that said television show will in fact, not save my soul, increase my finances, nor help my productivity for the Kingdom of God; and unless I have high aspirations of being a female vocalist (a false dream I am certain my family and friends would plead that I not pursue), American Idol is making more money off of me than I it; and therefore I must make perhaps what has been the biggest of decision over the last two hours of my life.

It is with mixed emotions that I announce to you and my relative world, that I, Ambra (last name witheld), am kicking American Idol to the curb. I have nothing against your show personally. In fact, I quite like your show very much. It is time however, that we depart. It's been "real" and "fake" all at the same time. I shall remember you always and forever recall how you singlehandedly turned a tiny, nobody, Asian boy, UC Berkley student, named William Hung and might I add perhaps one of the worst singers I've ever heard, into a pop-culture superstar. You're brilliant you idol people. You truly are.

An Avid WatcherCoke Sucks,
Ambra Nykol
Seattle, Washington

Posted by Ambra at April 5, 2004 02:15 AM

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i think you spelled BERKELEY wrong

Posted by: anonymous at January 17, 2005 08:37 AM

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