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2/26/2004
Weapons Assault on the Stupid
I'm tired and I don't feel like being deep, witty, or insightful today. Not that I ever am or was, but any semblance of that is gone. It had the crap kicked out of it as I sat in a long, monotonous training all day yesterday and today. So shallow looks pretty good to me right now. I need no depth whatsoever. I'm in desperate need of some fake conversation so if you want to IM me and partake, feel free. In other news, the Evangelical Outpost has some good words concerning the Condom Conspiracy. I'm in the midst of researching and writing an article concerning abstinence, and the total reality of my nemesis: Planned Parenthood. The research alone makes me sick to my stomach and angry. In fact, PISSED. It makes me angry enough to do massive harm to individuals. But we Christians don't do that right? I say it's a fine line sometimes. Or at least, I'd like to think so.
I've never considered myself a violent person. I have never participated in a physical fight in my entire life. Fifty percent of that fact can be attributed my being a girl, and sometimes a girlie girl at that. Not counting the hair pulling, scratching, wrestling and biting that took place amongst my siblings and I, my fight record is pretty clear. It took a lot to get me to attack back then, but given the right circumstances, clothing, and hairstyle, I can still body slam my 6'1" brother to this day. All 5'2" of me (And he better not forget it). Old times past, I have now entered the point of my life where I just can't stand "stupid" anymore. In fact, my flesh desperately wants to do horribly violent things to "stupid". What is "stupid" you ask?
Stupid is the guy, who in impatience, and most importantly, in an attempt to show off his manliness personified in his "new ride" will drive over the middle street barrier, in the opposite direction, in a lane of oncoming traffic, and swerve back onto his side seconds before a head-on collision could've occurred.
I wanted to jump out of my body and kill him.
Stupid is the idiot pedestrian who wants to test his mortality by knowingly jumping in front of my 45 mph moving vehicle and crossing the street. At that minute, I felt the only way to teach him a true lesson would have been to run him over. Then he would know not to joke like that next time. I have often wished that I could have a car made of rubber and hit someone when they do something stupid, not injure them at all. They'd just have the mess scared out of them. Then I could roll down my window and say, "Next time it will be a real car jerk and maybe God won't be so merciful and spare your life! Now get right and repent sinner."
Again, probably not the best approach. Probably not done in love. But boy have I ever wanted to.
Stupid is the idiot in the cage "playing" with the Lions. I don't care how tamed they are. Just keep playing with them and you'll see. Two words, Roy Horn. How about you let me spare you the trouble and I'll just saw off your arm myself.
Stupid refuses to acknowledges the laws of the Earth. Like gravity.
Stupid thinks he is invincible, and sometimes invisible.
Stupid refuses to recognize life is real.
Stupid thinks you can pack oneself in a crate and be shipped across the country and not be caught.
Stupid thinks packing oneself in a crate and being shipped to their destination will save them money on a plane ticket.
Stupid thinks a prison sentence for being arrested for mailing oneself in a crate is worth saving a few bucks on a plane ticket.
Stupid didn't even bother to think about air pressure or that fact that he could've died in the crate.
Stupid eats paste.
Stupid thinks Madonna can sing.
Stupid refutes there's a God.
Stupid doesn't respect the sanctity of human life.
Stupid is Jesse Jackson. Ha ha, at least that's my opinion.
As Webster defines: slow of mind, obtuse, given to unintelligent decisions or acts, acting in an unintelligent or careless manner, lacking intelligence or reason. My favorite: dulled in feeling or sensation.
So I will continue to restrain myself from killing or at least inflicting extreme bodily harm on "stupid". Self-control is good for us all. It stops us from being stupid. When you get a chance, please say a prayer for "stupid".
posted by ambra at 2/26/2004 05:16:10 PM | link to this entry |
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